The Lord has blessed me with extraordinary people whose proven what it is to have an absolute friend. These are individuals whose celebrated seasons of triumph and gone with me through the darkest days of my life. Their prayers, comfort, and encouragement have given me the courage and strength to overcome. It is because of their faithfulness and friendship that I share with you these empowering qualities of a friend.
Friendships offer people a sense of significance and purpose. Beloved, cultivating such a bond provides emotional, social, and mental support. With a faithful friend, you’re able to establish a healthy, peaceful relationship. “The man of too many friends [chosen indiscriminately] will be broken in pieces and come to ruin, But there is a [true, loving] friend who [is reliable and] sticks closer than a brother.” (Proverbs 18:24, AMP). You grow to trust and depend on each other while enjoying life to the fullest. You have someone to share your hopes, passions, even help you face any challenge. This person understands and values you without trying to change you. Many yearn for such friendship and acceptance.
Social media has become a forum to request friends and admirers. But what does that entail? Many decide their worth by the number of shares, likes, and followers they gain. The greater the amount, the more they see themselves as important, valuable, and acceptable. Do these factors define what a best friend is? These replies don’t show the essence of what it means to be a friend. First, they have not established a relationship. It takes much time to develop a connection with another person, which requires spending time together.
With the ever-increasing usage of technology, this gave us functions to correspond on a grander scale. The support of Skype, face time, email, and video chat; enables you to get to know someone. Social media could introduce you to anybody, but it’s a place you discover who your genuine friends are. What role does this play in finding out if you’re in a healthy relationship or one that leaves you depleted of love, respect, and hope? How can we avoid the pitfalls of human judgments and cultivate a friendship we are worthy of? So, let's define what it means to be a friend? The Greek word is phileo fil-eh’-o from 5384; to be a friend, fond of an individual or an object, i.e. have affection for, denoting personal attachment, as a matter of sentiment or feeling. (1) 5368.
Beloved, in your search for authentic friendship, ponder these questions.
Do I agree with you when my points of view are different?
Should I support you even though you are incorrect?
Does it mean to allow them to use me?
Am I expected to live up to their expectations?
Most people consider such a commitment as the solidarity of genuine friendship.
Now, let’s go on a journey and discover seven empowering qualities of a true friend. I pray this list gives you a fair understanding of the characteristics of a bona fide friend.
1. Treat You with Kindness
Kindness is the most valuable trait of a friend. I believe you should treat everybody better than how you want them to treat you. (Luke 6:31, CJB). No one desires someone to regard them as if they’re insignificant, and their feelings don’t matter. Everyone should know you appreciate having them in your life. Faithful friends don’t need prompting to disclose this. They do so because of who they are. You won’t carry out acts of kindnesses to gain acceptance or for what you can get. Kindness constrains you to go out of your way to support without being asked. You see a need, and can’t resist offering your service.
You think before you act and consider how your words and actions affect others. Genuine friends don't jump to conclusions, nor accuse anyone. You achieve the truth. Judging someone isn’t a part of what you do, either. You have the heart of your heavenly Father. The only time you look down on somebody is when you're lifting them from despair.
2. They’re Honest
Honesty is a powerful trait of a beloved friend. In a world that encourages applying your truth, relationships won’t survive deception and distorting the truth for someone to accept you. “Little children (believers, dear ones), let us not love [merely in theory] with word or with tongue [giving lip service to compassion], but in action and in truth [in practice and in sincerity, because practical acts of love are more than words].” (1 John 3:18). With tact and grace, a friend should tell you the truth about everything. When delicate topics come up, they’re not harsh and distasteful. Their heart shows a person who’s sensitive and compassionate.
They won’t lie to please you; neither will they use this as an opportunity to embarrass or correct you every time the chance clings open. Trustworthiness proves they don’t go on social media or use other means to spread filthy lies about you or anyone. Somebody who does such actions is not your friend.
3. Bring out Your Finest Potential
Friends challenges you to be who you should be without manipulating and changing you. They bring out the best in you. A real friend inspires you to see your potential and qualifications to live out God’s plan and purpose. “For we are His workmanship, created in Christ Jesus for good works, which God prepared beforehand so that we would walk in them.” (Ephesians 2:10, NASB). It is a person who encourages without trying to influence you. For example, when they discover your talent, they make comments and motivate you to realize how gifted you are. People such as this help uncover opportunities to display your skills. You may be shy, appear as awkward, but they recognize the extraordinary ability you have. With a gentle spirit, they’ll help you become who the Lord created you to be.
4. Respect and Esteem You
Society has forgotten what it means to respect others. Very many demands reverence but won’t offer it in return. “Show respect for all people [treat them honorably], love the brotherhood [of believers], fear God, honor the king.” (1 Peter 2:17). Friends conduct themselves with the utmost honor. They form their opinion of you from who they know you are. They won’t decide who you are from your past or those who gossip. They are authentic and don’t act one way to gain your respect and another when not in your presence. No behavior they display is offensive or inappropriate. Friends never take for granted it’s acceptable to use foul language around you. You perceive they understand keeping your confidence. When the circumstances demand it, they’ll urge you not to conceal secrets that need to come out.
Another true sign of a friend, they won’t expose other people’s business to you. If someone’s doing this, what do you think they’re saying about you behind your back? You laugh and enjoy each other’s company. Even those occasions, when disagreements arise, neither hurts the others.
5. Defend You for the Right Cause
Everyone who stands for right instead of wrong and embraces truth over error is a priceless treasure. In a world where teasing, bullying, and hazing are acceptable, you don’t allow anyone to do this to an individual you consider a friend. “Do not merely look out for your own personal interests, but also for the interests of others.” (Philippians 2:4). This person won’t laugh when others humiliate you because that’s not how they want anybody to treat them. Nor will they judge you based on other’s assessments. People could try to turn someone against you, but when you’re in a relationship with a friend, they are not supporting such actions. They speak up, get help, even defend you. They are unashamed in proving that you are of significant value.
6. Hold Me Accountable While Accepting Me
Accountability keeps you honest and responsible and is essential in any relationship. Friends stay true, correct you if you do something that’s not adhering to moral values and ethics. A sincere friend doesn’t conform when you’re wrong. They accept you with your flaws and shortcomings without asking you to live up to their expectations. When they see repetitive behaviors, your buddy holds you answerable while encouraging you to grow, change, and go to a higher level.
Beloved, loyal to a fault, does not exist because such actions cause you to be blind to their shortcoming. “Listen to counsel, receive instruction, and accept correction, That you may be wise in the time to come.” (Proverbs 19:20). We agree to disagree if our views are different without imposing our beliefs on each other. You are comfortable discussing everything because you know they won’t judge you. Neither will they become angry and abandon the friendship.
7. Not Insecure of Your Relationships with Others
Having friends involves spending time together. When you’re in a relationship, you must learn to balance this while staying committed. not neglecting to meet together, as is the habit of some, but encouraging one another, and all the more as you see the Day drawing near. (Hebrews 10:25, ESV). Some people are challenging because they desire the center of attention. It is because of their insecurities. So, no problems arise when you can’t attend an affair, they hoped you could. They understand your life doesn’t revolve around them. They won’t ruin a friendship you have with someone they dislike because they are not jealous.
Another crucial point, friends don’t persuade you to dress and act like them. Your friend respects your individuality while respecting your uniqueness. If you have a distinct style of dressing, they still appreciate being with you. They’re not molding you into who they are. You are free to enjoy your choice of music, voice your opinion, even your beliefs without feeling they won’t accept you.
8. Support and Stand by Your Side
Your friend supports you during good times and difficult seasons. They cheer you up and console you if you’re hurting. “Now when Job’s three friends heard of all this adversity that had come upon him, each one came from his own place, Eliphaz the Temanite, Bildad the Shuhite, and Zophar the Naamathite; for they had made an appointment together to come to sympathize with him and to comfort him.” (Job 2:11). They celebrate your victories without becoming envious. They are your most devoted admirers and proudest cheerers. When they don’t know what to say, they’re by your side, praying and seeing you through. When you’re wrong, they love you but will compel you to be honorable and choose righteousness despite the consequences. Beloved, whatever the outcome, friends won’t bail on you. A real friend stands by you and remains faithful no matter what for they’re your friend for a lifetime.
Cherish the friends God’s has given you. They are priceless and a blessing. I pray the musical selection, I Will Be Your Friend by Michael W. Smith ministers to you.
Can you help me encourage someone today? Please comment, share, hit that heart to show your support. Thank you, My Friend.
RESOURCE LOUNGE: Bless yourself and others with a Christmas gift that will warm their heart.
DONATE to these worthy causes:
Comments